I am a Transsexual

I am a Transsexual


Hello, I’m Mello Spades and I am a sixteen-year-old Transsexual Male. At an early age I knew I was born in the wrong sex, it was hard for me to understand why I couldn’t take my shirt off or stand up to pee; it wasn’t that I did Male related things I just knew I was Male. Transsexual in my own define meaning I was born male psychologically but was born into the wrong sex. Throughout my childhood I didn’t like the way looked or how my voice sounded I would often say “I am not a girl, I’m a boy” and I would turn away from my photos being taken or refuse to watch videos of myself because I knew the person who was staring back at me wasn’t me. I started my transition from female to male at the age of thirteen I got my haircut short and started to wear even more masculine clothing that matched who I know I am and even started to make my voice sound deeper. I used to bind with ace bandage wrap to make my chest look flatter, which ace bandage wrap isn’t safe to use.
After a year of using ace bandage wrap to bind I found out what a binder was, it’s a bra like clothing piece that makes someone’s chest look flat with fabric that flattens out your chest. I waited every day for two weeks to get my binder from GC2B and when I did I put that sucker on as soon as I tore the package. It was a great moment that I knew this is a step-in progress that could be the man I knew I am one day. I started packing with a sock packer which is a homemade packer that is made from a sock that is made to look like male genitalia. It was weird at first because I wasn’t use to having a bulge and sometimes it would almost fall out. When I was fourteen I came out as a transsexual to some of my friends I had at the time and I lost friends and I kept friends who were accepting, and they would ask questions like “What’s your name?” Or “Can I call you he and him?”. My accepting friends started using my name and he and him pronouns and some of them would mistake me for the sex I am not which is fine it will happen just brush it off and it will be okay. When I came out in the eighth grade as a transsexual I got bullied for coming out and living my life as myself, it was a really hard time for me because I was depressed, and I had anxiety bad which affected me daily. I didn’t let bulling get me down all the time, what I learned is to always have positive energy around you because who wants negative energy roaming around. I came out to my brother and mom as well when I was fourteen, it didn’t go good because they weren’t accepting but it takes time for people to came around and they may eventually will. My mom told me “She supports but not in transition” which that hurt but I learned to move on from that because I told myself “Someday your get on T(Testosterone) and get top surgery”. My brother wasn’t accepting he basically told I was a female and I wasn’t a transsexual, which is very wrong because he can’t tell who I am, and he can’t define me. The person that is on the outside isn’t me that’s what people don’t understand. Now that I’m sixteen I’m happily being me at some percent I tell myself “Until the day I die I will make my body to where it is suitable for me” and I go by that daily. Even though I can’t take my next step in my transition yet that’s not going keep me down because I’m going to keep my head up.
Recently I became a social media activist for transsexuals to raise awareness for transsexual people and to show people we STILL exist in meaning there’s still people who use transsexual. I don’t define transsexual people because we are all different I just want people to understand we are still alive and kicking and to spread light. Since the STWs (Social Justice Warriors) are trying to redefine and erase history. Their basically brainwashing people to think that transsexual, queer, homosexual, and many other terms are bad to say or use to describe oneself. I’m starting to advocate online to help stop these hateful and insecure people from telling people how to define their self’s and which words to say or not to say which is not right. STWs are basically trying to erase LGBT history and take away terms that people still define their selves as, but that’s not going to happen; I have a voice and I will use it. It's time for people to defend their selves and stop letting STWs walk all over them. They mainly think people who are not going by their “agenda “identifying, going by their terms, and talking like them are their enemy's. The number one thing to do is to not let their toxin get to you, don’t let them tell you should live your life. What people don't realize is transsexual and transgender mean two different things which I do believe this is a topic that needs to be addressed. Some of older and younger generation uses the term transsexual, it's not at all offensive or outdated. I also advocate to support and help transsexuals as well and to let my voice and my experiences be heard and to let people know to be their selves no matter what others may say or think. I am a proud transsexual and I will never be afraid to say that.


Mello LGBT Stories November 05, 2017 at 9:24 pm 0 103
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